Asexuality Awareness Week

Some facts about asexuality for Asexuality Awareness Week:

One: 

There is no mental/emotional (psychological) arousal or attraction to other individuals.

Two: 

Asexuality is not a hatred of sex. A fear or hatred of sex is erotophobia. Any person of any sexuality can have erotophobia.

Three: 

Physical arousal is still possible. This is because the body will react to physical stimuli even if there was no desire for said stimuli. For example, when the digestive system receives the physical stimuli of food, it will still digest said food whether or not this food was desired. Likewise, if genatalia receives physical stimuli, it will respond.

Four: 

Asexuals do have sex. An asexual may be in a loving relationship and part of showing that is with sex. Also, an asexual may desire to have a child with said partner. Also Fact Five.

Five: 

Asexuals can enjoy sex. Just because you have no desire for something doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it: you may not have a desire for chocolate but if you had some you will still enjoy it. Sex (along with being fed, watered and sheltered) is a basic human function, a basic human desire necessary for a contented life. The ‘normal’ individual is driven to satisfy/fulfil all these desires, though there are many reasons why people may not feel the desire (eating disorders, hydrophobia, becoming an ascetic for religious/spiritual reasons and living without shelter). When one of these desires is met, the body will be satisfied/fulfilled. There are degrees to desire: if you haven’t drank for an hour, the glass of water will be nice, joyful and pleasurable, but if you are dehydrated, this water will feel great and be satisfying. The desire for sex works in much the same. Sexually-orientated people don’t have ‘not turned-on’ and ‘turned-on’ settings for their sexual desire: there are still degrees, many points in between these two extremes. An asexual can receive joy/pleasure from sex, but it won’t be a feeling close to satisfaction.

Six: 

Asexuality is on the Sexuality Spectrum. Why? Semisexuality, that’s why! Semisexuality is the area of the spectrum between asexuality and sexuality, in ‘grey-sexuality’, for sexuality is not black and white. But if there is term, a definition is required to as to help align individuals with what fits them best. Semisexuality is when an individual who otherwise identifies as asexual (there are of course hetero/homo/bi/pan/whatever varieties of semisexuality) may occasionally feel psychological arousal (if to the opposite gender, then semiheterosexuality etc) and/or have a low sex drive, sometimes so low that it’s not strong enough to be acted upon. Depending on how much sexual arousal/drive an individual has will help them inform their decision on whether to label themselves as semisexual (when the sexual desires/fulfilment are, even though uncommon, of significance) or asexual (if the asexual tendencies far outweigh sexual desire).

OTHER:

This is a reformulation of the above, used to explain asexuality to a particular audience.

It literally means 'not sexual', though, as with anything in human nature, this isn't a black or white issue yet people make it such.

The differentiation between two concepts, arousal and desire, is required. Desire is an individual's sex drive which varies in degrees depending on many factors, including mood, romantic inclination, and taboo-breaking.

Desires are drives for the four fundamental factors of fulfillment, those things that provide a satisfied and contented life: food, water, shelter and sex. The majority of people will feel the force of all these desires, though there are examples of people who lack these drives, who aren't driven to satisfy or fulfill these. Specific eating disorders, hydrophobia, or becoming a religious ascetic without shelter are all examples. Asexuality is the same: absence of sexual desire.

Arousal is the physical manifestation of sexual stimulation, whether the stimuli is psychological (emotional/mental) or physical. An asexual lacks psychological arousal though they do have physical arousal. The body reacts to physical stimuli whether it was desired or not: your body digests food even if this food wasn't desired. It's exactly the same with genitals.

There are two more misconceptions, both of which can be quite offensive because they imply that we don't know ourselves. One: people will say, "Maybe if you had decent sex..." Nope, that has nothing to do with it. Two: it's just erotophobia. It's not a fear of sex at all. Just because you don't want to do your housework doesn't mean that you're scared of it. Anyone of any sexual inclination can fear sex.

Another important thing to keep in mind is that an asexual can enjoy, and feel pleasure from, sex. It just won't be felt as satisfying for an asexual because there can be no fulfillment of a desire as without the desire there cannot be satisfaction.

Not only is it enjoyable, but sex provides benefits for a couple regardless of their sexual inclinations. It brings the couple closer together, initiates a sense of trust, allows them to have children.

Of course, it's important to remember about semisexuality. This is when someone who otherwise identifies as an asexual has a sex drive, albeit slow and rare, and/or has the occasional feeling of psychological arousal. It's too often to be asexual but definitely too infrequent to be sexual. If these feelings are extremely rare (like only once from the onset of puberty), the individual may still identify as an asexual.